What
is co-sleeping?
Does anyone really co-sleep?
What are the
advantages of co-sleeping?
Are there different
ways to co-sleep?
What are the guidelines for safe
co-sleeping?
Are there things I shoud avoid when co-sleeping?
What do doctors say about co-sleeping?
Where
can I learn even more about co-sleeping?

What is co-sleeping?
Co-sleeping is the simple act of sharing
your sleep environment with your child. As radical as it
might seem, if you ask a group of parents, we think you’ll
find that most share sleep with their children at least on
occasion. Many parents co-sleep on a part- time basis, for
example, during times of stress (i.e. a move, or travel),
when a child is ill, has a nightmare, or just during the
wee hours of the morning to allow for a little more sleep.
Other families co-sleep full time. In our own lives, we feel
this practice makes life a little more consistent. Statistics
show that over 70% of families share a bed with their young
children in one way or another, and that three times more
nursing moms co-sleep than non-nursing moms. (back to top)
Does anyone really co-sleep?
Well, for starters, we do (and so does everyone
else involved in our company)! Co-sleeping is actually the
norm in most other countries. In fact, the idea of babies
sleeping in their own cribs was really only introduced 200
years ago. America remains the only place in the world where
placing a child in his own bed in his own room is the norm.
Ask a European, Asian, or African parent if they sleep with
their child and they may give you a confused look; they may
not even understand what you mean. In fact, in more than
two -thirds of the cultures around the world, mothers sleep
with their infants and instinctively (yes, without even waking
up!) soothe their infants back to sleep when they show any
signs of arousing. (back
to top)
What are the advantages of co-sleeping?
Everyone sleeps better! How’s that for a
big advantage? A parent (usually mom) doesn’t have to get
out of bed to attend to his/her child’s nighttime needs (i.e.
nighttime feedings, diaper changes, extra cuddling). Babies
also go back to sleep much more quickly because they aren’t
left to cry long enough to really fully awaken from sleep.
A drawn-out bedtime ritual doesn’t have to be developed to
get your children to sleep – usually you end up asleep as
well and somewhere much less comfortable than your own bed
(i.e. chair, sofa, or floor of your child’s room). Because
of the simplicity of the task, and because they know their
parents will be near, children don’t fight going to bed;
they don’t see sleep as the enemy. Children that sleep with
their parents are also more securely attached; if you must
be away from your child during the day, co-sleeping offers
a way to really reconnect with your child. (back
to top)
Are there different ways to co-sleep?
Yes. Since co-sleeping is a loose term that means sharing
your sleep environment it can be used to describe any of
the following arrangements:1. Having your child sleep in
your bed. 2. Having your child sleep in a crib next to your
bed with the side down so the crib and the bed are "connected." 3.
Having your child sleep in a cradle or crib next to but separate
from your bed. 4. Having your child sleep on a mattress on
the floor in your room.
Many families rely on the use of a co-sleeping bassinet
– a sort of “side-car” that pulls up to the side of your
bed. We found that our co-sleeping bassinet became a glorified
laundry basket and didn’t really provide the kind of closeness
we craved. In addition, it does not eliminate the need
for mom or dad to get out of bed to attend to the nighttime
needs of an infant (i.e. nursing, diaper changing, and
cuddling)
Other parents simply place their child between
them in bed and share-sleep in that manner. This practice
makes some people a little nervous as baby can roll around
easily between the parents. It is better to wait until the
toddler years to co-sleep in this manner.
Still others set up bed rails or use an unusual array of
pillows and rolled blankets to keep a child on one end of
the bed. While this practice is, for the most part, safe,
the pillows/blankets/bed rails really seem to take up a lot
of the actual bed space, making it less comfortable for all
involved.
We have always felt that there had to be
a better alternative to all of the above ways to co-sleep
– something more simple, more secure, more practical. That
is why we invented the Tres Tria. Simply slip the natural
latex bolster under the fitted sheet on your bed and sidle
the baby right up to it. It creates a lot more room in the
bed, but at the same time keeps the baby safe and secure.
It can also be used in many more ways later on down the road
– to support a pregnant mother, position a tiny nursling,
keep a toddler in his/her “big kid” bed, or just as a fantastic
reading pillow. (back
to top)
What are the guidelines for safe
co-sleeping?
(answer taken from AskDrSears.com)
Here are some ways to educate parents on how to sleep safely
with their baby:
Take precautions to prevent baby from rolling out of bed,
even though it is unlikely when baby is sleeping next to
mother. Like heat-seeking missiles, babies automatically
gravitate toward a warm body. Yet, to be safe, place baby
between mother and [what else, of course, but your Tres Tria]
...
Place baby adjacent to mother, rather than between mother
and father. Mothers we have interviewed on the subject of
sharing sleep feel they are so physically and mentally aware
of their baby's presence even while sleeping, that it's extremely
unlikely they would roll over onto their baby. Some fathers,
on the other hand, may not enjoy the same sensitivity of
baby's presence while asleep; so it is possible they might
roll over on or throw out an arm onto baby. After a few months
of sleep-sharing, most dads seem to develop a keen awareness
of their baby's presence.
Place baby to sleep on his back.
Use a large bed, preferably a queen-size or king-size. A
king-size bed may wind up being your most useful piece of "baby
furniture." If you only have a cozy double bed, use
the money that you would ordinarily spend on a fancy crib
and other less necessary baby furniture and treat yourselves
to a safe and comfortable king-size bed.
Some parents and babies sleep better if baby is still in
touching and hearing distance, but not in the same bed. For
them, a bedside co-sleeper is a safe option. (back
to top)
Here are some things to avoid:
Do not sleep with your baby if:
◦ You are under the influence of any drug (such as alcohol
or tranquilizing medications) that diminishes your sensitivity
to your baby's presence. If you are drunk or drugged, these
chemicals lessen your arousability from sleep.
◦
You are extremely obese. Obesity itself may cause sleep apnea
making it hard for you to be responsive to your baby during
the night.
◦ You are exhausted from sleep deprivation. This lessens your
awareness of your baby and your arousability from sleep.
◦ You are breastfeeding a baby on a cushiony surface, such
as a waterbed or couch. An exhausted mother could fall asleep
breastfeeding and roll over on the baby.
◦ You are the child's baby-sitter. A baby-sitter's awareness
and arousability is unlikely to be as acute as a mother's.
Don't allow older siblings to sleep with a baby under nine
months. Sleeping children do not have the same awareness
of tiny babies as do parents, and too small or too crowded
a bed space is an unsafe sleeping arrangement for a tiny
baby.
Don't fall asleep with baby on a couch. Baby may get wedged
between the back of the couch and the larger person's body,
or baby's head may become buried in cushion crevices or soft
cushions.
Do not sleep with baby on a free-floating, wavy waterbed
or similar "sinky" surface in which baby could
suffocate.
Don't overheat or overbundle baby. Be particularly aware
of overbundling if baby is sleeping with a parent. Other
warm bodies are an added heat source.
Don't wear lingerie with string ties longer than eight inches.
Ditto for dangling jewelry. Baby may get caught in these
entrapments.
Avoid pungent hair sprays, deodorants, and perfumes. Not
only will these camouflage the natural maternal smells that
baby is used to and attracted to, but foreign odors may irritate
and clog baby's tiny nasal passages. Reserve these enticements
for sleeping alone with your spouse.
Parents should use common sense when sharing sleep. Anything
that could cause you to sleep more soundly than usual or
that alters your sleep patterns can affect your baby's safety.
The question shouldn't be "is it safe to sleep with
my baby?", but rather "how can I sleep with my
baby safely?" (back
to top)
What do doctors say about co-sleeping?
Well, that’s a tricky question to answer. Two very notable
physicians, namely Dr. William Sears, MD (author of many
books on attachment parenting) and Dr. Jay Gordon (also a
very noted and well-published physician) work tirelessly
to promote co-sleeping and its place in our lives. Many pediatricians
are still balking at the practice, but the research is there
and definitely supports co-sleeping all the way. In countries
where co-sleeping is the norm (that is, almost every other
country except the United States) SIDS is unheard of and
breastfeeding is far more successful. Dr. Sears’ website
link (provided in the link section of this article) includes
his own research into co-sleeping, carried out in his own
home, with his own wife and children. A third doctor, Dr.
James J. McKenna of the Notre Dame Mother Baby Behavioral
Sleep Laboratory, has done much research to bolster the body
of evidence supporting co-sleeping in various forms. His
work is paramount in the fight to make co-sleeping a more
acceptable practice in this country.
Co-sleeping is also highly recommended by
the La Leche League (the unequivocal leader and authority
on breastfeeding practices) because it makes ecological breastfeeding
that much easier by not requiring mother to get out of bed
at all during the nighttime hours. (back
to top)
Where can I learn even more about
co-sleeping?
SUGGESTED READING
The Family Bed by Tine Thevenin
The Attachment Parenting Book: A Common Sense Guide to Understanding
and Nurturing Your Baby by William Sears, MD and Martha Sears
Good Nights: The Happy Parents’ Guide to the Family Bed
(and a Peaceful Night’s Sleep) by Maria Goodavage and Dr.
Jay Gordon
Three in a Bed: The Benefits of Sharing Sleep With Your
Baby by Deborah Jackson
The No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley
Safe Sleeping with Baby: A Parent’s Guide by Dr. James J.
McKenna
SUGGESTED LINKS:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000.asp
http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp
http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/cosleeping.asp
http://www.naturalchild.com/guest/tami_breazeale.html
http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/index.html
http://www.naturalchild.com/james_mckenna/
OVERALL SUPPORT FOR ATTACHMENT PARENTING LIFESTYLE:
http://www.mothering.com and Mothering Magazine
specifically, these selected articles:
Breastfeeding & Bedsharing Still Useful (and Important) after All These Years
Where Should Babies Sleep at Night?: A Review of the Evidence from the CESDI SUDI
Study Solitary or Shared Sleep: What's Safe?
Sleep Environment Safety Checklist
How the Stats Really Stack Up: Cosleeping Is Twice As Safe
The Complexity of Parent-Child Cosleeping: Researching Cultural Beliefs
The New Zealand Experience: How Smoking Affects SIDS Rates
Bedsharing among Maoris: An Indigenous Tradition
Rooming-in at the Hospital: Assessing the Practical Considerations
Sleeping Like a Baby: How Bedsharing Soothes Infants
Not Designed to Sleep Alone
Bedsharing Research in Britian
The Family Bed: It's Safe and Here's Why
Three in a Bed A Foot in Your Face, or Ten Other Reasons to Family Bed
Sleep with Me: A Trans-cultural Look at the Power--and Protection--of Sharing a Bed
A Maya Spiritual Bath That Heals a Child's Nightmares
Sleep, Beautiful, Sleep: You, too, Can Take a Nap
Pillow Talk: Helping your Child Get a Good Night's Sleep
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